Have you noticed how quickly some people judge those who are unable to commit or choose not commit? People call them selfish and commitment-phobes, or assume something’s wrong with them.
But would you judge yourself with that same quickness if you realized you can’t commit to yourself?
Here are some signs that you have difficulty committing to yourself:
- You struggle with keeping promises to yourself like working out at least once a week or eating healthy
- You can’t seem to take out at least 10 minutes a day to focus on your needs and wants
- You put your goals on hold because you feel like you’re “too busy” with everything else
For those of you who don’t have this problem, great. This message may not be for you. If you can identify with the above, you’re not alone. I have struggled (and still struggle) with committing to myself. Here are five tips I use to make committing to myself a priority:
- Have an Accountability Buddy
Sometimes we need to have someone else in our corner to give us the kick in the ass we need, kinda like personal trainers and Bible Study groups. Once you tell your accountability buddy what you want to accomplish, that person will let you know when you’re deviating from your goal or when you’re slacking. I have accountability partners for almost every aspect of my life and it’s helped so much.
- Put Reminders On Your Phone
Some people don’t like their phones going off throughout the day, but it doesn’t bother me; especially if it’s words of encouragement and reminders to help me meet my goals. Think about it, you carry your phone with you everywhere you go; why not use it for professional AND personal gain?
- Make Time for Yourself Every day
You may not think you have that luxury, but you do. Even if you take a 10 minute walk on your lunch break, that counts to your overall peace of mind. If you don’t want to walk, make it a priority to watch your favorite TV show every day to put you in better spirits. Whatever you choose, make sure it’s something you want to do that makes you happy.
- Remember You’re Just As Important As Everyone Else
This may seem like a no-brainer, but it’s not. Sometimes you put your significant other, kids, and your friends over your own needs, which is admirable, but it’s also dangerous if you start to feel drained. If you find yourself thinking how much you’re missing out on life, or what you want to do for yourself, but can’t do it, it’s time to take for yourself. Your needs matter just as much as everyone else’s. If you aren’t happy, it can be difficult to be genuinely happy for others. I’m not saying be mean to everyone and say “screw you”. I’m encouraging you to have a balance between fulfilling your needs and everyone else’s.
- Connect With Like-Minded People
Connect with people who do what you ideally want to do professionally and personally. This is a great opportunity to learn about their journey, which can help you commit to making a plan for yourself. If the person you admire isn’t easily accessible, see if they wrote a book about their life and career journey that can help you. You’re worth it.
So before you try to criticize or judge someone for their lack of commitment, make sure you’re willing to commit to yourself – your first true love.