Other than Black History Month, February is associated with love, sex and romance because of the most commercialized holiday next to Christmas: Valentine’s Day!

Whether you’re in a relationship and go out on a date with your special someone; if you’re single and make it a Galentine’s Day; or if you roll your eyes at the thought of either scenario, Valentine’s Day is pretty much inescapable.

We watch brands promote it in commercials and our favorite TV shows make an episode commemorating the holiday. We also hear it as we listen to the radio or podcast episodes and see decorations in department stores. Valentine’s Day is literally all around us.

But what about self love?

What about falling in love with you, particularly in the case of spirituality?

LET ME EXPLAIN

I mentioned in my first blog post that one of the best pieces of advice I got from a former teacher was “learning how your spirit works is the most powerful and important thing you can do so enjoy the journey but pray for and practice discernment”.

In other words, spiritual initiations and getting readings are great, but don’t forget to nurture and listen to your own intuition.

But what if how your spirit works with you scares you?

What if you rely so much on a teacher, a friend or a family member that you lose your identity and doubt yourself?

What if you are on the go so much that you don’t set aside time to ask yourself what you truly need and listen to the response?

If any of the above sounds familiar because you’re living it (or you know someone who is), I get it.

I used to be in the thick of it and unfortunately, allowed other people’s voices to be louder than mine when it came to life choices.

I would be rippin’ and runnin’ with life – work, errands for me and my mom, cooking, making time for my man and loved ones – that at one point I didn’t touch my tarot cards for a year and soly focused on getting spiritual readings from my former teacher.

I would pray at my altar but I didn’t truly spend as much time listening as much as I did venting.

But when I started honing in on my spiritual gifts, I started trusting and accepting myself more – and it feels amazing!

HOW DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOUR SPIRITUAL GIFTS ARE?

When people think of spiritual gifts/abilities, most people think that psychics (clairvoyants) and mediums (clairaudience). However, there are actually eight different types of clairs – Clairvoyance, Clairgustance, Clairsalience, Clairaudience, Claircognizance, Clairsentience, Clairempathy, Clairtangency.

Psychiclilly.com has a great break down of each clair:

Clairvoyance – Clear Seeing

Clairvoyance is the ability to see beyond the physical world. This may appear as visions, images, symbols, or even flashes of light and color.

Clairaudience – Clear Hearing

This is the gift of hearing messages from the spirit realm. It may sound like a whisper, a word, music, or even your own inner voice speaking truths that guide your path.

Clairsentience – Clear Feeling

Clairsentience allows you to feel energy. Empaths often carry this ability strongly, sensing emotions, vibrations, or even physical sensations connected to people, places, or spirits.

Clairempathy – Clear Emotional Feeling

Different from general empathy, clairempathy is tuning into the emotions of others at a deep spiritual level.

Clairalience – Clear Smelling

Clairalience is the intuitive ability to smell fragrances or odors without a physical source.

Clairangency (Psychometry) – Clear Touch

Clairangency, also known as psychometry, you can pick up impressions through touch. Holding an object, photo, or personal belonging may reveal information about its history or the person connected to it. (Think Wednesday Adams)

Claircognizance – Clear Knowing

Claircognizance is a sudden knowing without explanation. Answers, insights, or warnings appear in your mind instantly, as though downloaded from the universe.

Clairgustance – Clear Tasting

This rare gift allows you to taste substances without eating them. For example, you might suddenly taste a favorite food of a loved one in spirit — a sign they are close.

HOW CAN YOU FIGURE OUT YOUR CLAIR?

Aycee Brown has a great resource where she asks you questions and provides audio insights to get your started on which clair you have and how to practice it called Psychic Essentials.

You practice your clair in every day life but if you want or need a space to focus and harness your gift, you can start with an altar.

An altar is a spiritual space you create, where you can talk to your ancestors, pray, pull tarot cards/use divination tools and listen to your intuition.

I keep the four elements on my altar and a few other things but the most popular altar items I’ve heard people recommend is starting with a candle, a bowl or cup of water and pictures of your ancestors. If you want to learn how to keep an altar, celebrity psychic and tarot card reader Bootz Tarot is having a virtual class here.

Everyone has different ways to keep an altar and honor their ancestors so be curious, ask questions, do your own research, and see what works for you if you feel called to do so.

If you want to learn more about ancestor veneration and talk to your ancestors, there will be books and social media posts in the resources.

WINNING IS IN THE AIR

Remember we’re in a Universal Year 1! 2026 is all about taking bold new steps, trusting the unknown, and moving into a fresh cycle—without forgetting the lessons of the past via Vogue.

Well, this year has been full of wins and these wins are SERIOUS based on YEARS in the making!!!

The Grammys were on this Sunday and here are some of my favorite highlights:

Rapper Eve retroactively received a Grammy for “You Got Me” 26 Years LATER

Shaboozy is the first Black man to win a Grammy for best country duo

But my ultimate favorite Grammy win of the night was DURAN BERNARR!!! He won Best Progressive R&B album (formerly known as Urban Contemporary R&B Album) This win was 21 years in the making!!! Check out his epic speech here.

BUT HE’S A CELEBRITY. WHAT ABOUT ORDINARY PEOPLE?

If you thought the above in your head or said it out loud,  it’s still okay and I have TWO examples:

The first one is TikToker @RomeoShow who made Dr. Pepper’s latest jingle on TikTok. If you are living under a rock, here is the video. She also did one for Vito Coco.

The second one pissed me off so badly that I didn’t even want to investigate her name or who she is – all I know is that there is a woman out here PLAYING WATER with an orchestra! YES, you read that correctly PLAY-ING WAR-TER.

THE TRUTH

The truth is it is time to do the things we say we want to do. The goals you want to accomplish, the dreams of how you want your life to be, the hobby or project you keep going back to – it’s time to finally do that thing even if it’s in small steps.

This is a reminder for me just as much as it is a reminder for you!

I still struggle with comparing myself to others. I’m still frustrated with where my life is right now. And I’m genuinely hurt that the work I did in the past didn’t pay off monetarily or materially.

But if I reflect honestly, I didn’t stay in jobs or industries long enough to see the fruits of my labor – whether it was because I realized I didn’t like what came with certain jobs (long hours, no real work/life balance, etc), health issues (burn out, depression, etc), or external circumstances (getting fired, taking too long of a break after burn out, hiding because I’m too scared to be seen or the criticism that comes with it). 

The hard truth is… to build the life I want, I have to show up, do the work, stay consistent and not worry about how long it takes me because life is going to life and my journey is my journey – knowing my spiritual gifts and honing in on them helps.

This isn’t to say I will not consult with anyone spirituality. I actually came to the above realization from a spiritual session because sometimes I need guidance when I feel extremely stuck.

I am encouraging you to learn your spiritual gifts, practice them and have discernment in any spiritual guidance you get along the way as you do the work you need to do to achieve your goals and create the life you desire.

RESOURCES

Aycee Brown:

Social Post | Which Clair is Actually Your Strength

Social Post | Money Magnetism Map 

Mini-Course | Psychic Essentials

E-Book | Money Magnetism Map

Ancestor Veneration:

Social Post | How Many Ancestor Connections Are There?

Social Post | Ancestor Veneration: What happens when someone dies… even if they weren’t “good” in life 

Social Post | Rapper KRS on Ancestor Veneration

Book | Jambalaya by Luisah Teish

Book | Finding Soul on the Path of the Orisa by Tobe Melora Correal 

If you are adopted like me and don’t know your ancestors but want to learn more about your lineage, follow Tayannah Lee McQuillar on Instagram for free game on how to do your genealogy research, especially if you are Black American.

Tobe Melora Correal’s book I reference above also has a nice invocation for ancestors you may not know that I’ve used and I think is helpful.

What are your spiritual gifts?

What project, goal or hobby that you’re working on that you are ready to finally pursue?

Leave a comment below 🙂

*Originally post was published on the I Care Project Newsletter. Content has been edited to reflect website format. Some links may no longer be live.*